Dreamers: “They said it was impossible, I did it anyway”, with Sabri Suby of King Kong

Work ethic is your edge. My work ethic is really the only thing that I can control. Combining clever strategy with being the hardest workers in the industry is what has seen my agency thrive. I believe there isn’t any problem that can’t be overcome by sound strategy and a sheer amount of work directed towards it.

I had the pleasure of interviewing Sabri Suby, Founder and Head of Growth, King Kong. Sabri Suby is the founder of Australia’s fastest-growing digital marketing agency, King Kong, and author of international bestseller Sell Like Crazy. Having originally founded King Kong in 2014 from his bedroom, Sabri has bootstrapped the company since day one and in under five years has successfully built a team of 63 specialists and a company valued at $30million with a growth rate of 312 per cent. As a pioneer in the digital marketing arena, his business has impacted more than 250,000 businesses in 42 different countries and has generated in excess of $1.3 billion in sales for him and his clients.

Thank you so much for joining us! Our readers would love to ‘get to know you’ a bit better. Can you tell us your ‘backstory’?

I got my start in sales when I was 16 years old. I sold in many ways: face to face, one to many, door to door, over the telephone. At the start I was really average at it, but I was also really dedicated. I eventually mastered it, and that was my first foray into the business world. I started my first business when I was 21 and since then I’ve sold a business, run a business into the ground and had a few big successes along the way.

I’ve always been driven to get new customers. In all those businesses, and even when I was selling, it was always about the challenge of getting new clients. That’s been the focus of my career and led me to founding King Kong and being in the position that I am today.

King Kong is now Australia’s fastest-growing digital marketing agency and has revolutionized the way businesses see results though digital marketing. We use true return on investment (ROI) to measure success in an industry full of cowboys counting vanity metrics.

But while challenging the status quo in this way has worked for us, it’s also a double-edged sword. When we run a campaign we literally have nowhere to hide if it doesn’t do well. We don’t cite social reach numbers, brand awareness or any of these soft metrics — either it made money, or it didn’t.

With a growth rate of over 300%, we are skyrocketing in our success with our Melbourne base helping clients across Australia and overseas with services including SEO, CRO, PPC, Facebook Advertising, web design and landing pages.

Are you working on any new or exciting projects now? How do you think that will help people?

I’m working on a platform to help businesses grow and I think it will help tens of thousands of businesses create much more predictable and sustainable businesses, get more clients and have a more positive impact in what they do. I can’t share any more than that about it right now though!

In your opinion, what do you think makes your company or organization stand out from the crowd?

I am the founder of Australia’s fastest growing full-service digital marketing agency (Australia’s 28th fastest growing business), with clients around the world. To date we’ve generated a $1.33 billion plus for King Kong and its clients. This is a significant statistic in an industry peppered with vanity metrics that fail to demonstrate true ROI. Our rapid growth and success are in direct proportion to the value we’ve provided the marketplace, whether they are a client or not.

Our ROI-driven approach has been a huge contributor to growth and has allowed us to stand out and attract our growing client base in a very fragmented market. We can literally show and track ROI so it’s easier to give clients the confidence they need to increase budgets when more revenue is guaranteed. As such, King Kong has grown with our clients, which has been a huge contributor to our rapid growth.

Our philosophy has seen us completely disrupt the digital marketing space and King Kong’s continued success is living proof that real ROI is exactly what businesses want.

Businesses that want to grow, and grow fast, come to us.

Like many entrepreneurial efforts, my business venture was created in a bedroom. Five years ago, when I discovered an irresistible gap in the digital space and committed growing my business at unprecedented pace with groundbreaking results.

My experience and my success also led to me writing Sell Like Crazy which became an international bestseller within days of launching.

Ok, thank you for that. I’d like to jump to the main focus of this interview. Has there ever been a time that someone told you something was impossible, but you did it anyway? Can you share the story with us? What was your idea? What was the reaction of the naysayers? And how did you overcome that?

I chose to self-publish my book which was met with a huge amount of criticism. People said the fact that I wasn’t going through a traditional publishing house would mean I would struggle to sell any copies as I couldn’t distribute through traditional bookstores.

I broke through these barriers of skepticism and self-published, created my own website and now sell thousands of copies each month. The naysayers have simply shut their mouths in awe. I think it’s 98 percent of books never sell beyond their first print run and there are 121, 000 new books published every year. This is what we sell in just one month!

In the end, how were all the naysayers proven wrong? 🙂

They were proven wrong by the fact that we now sell more books in a single month than most books do in a lifetime. We’re constantly doing more print runs with demand increasing, both online and in bookstores.

None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?

I grew up in a small regional beach town in northern New South Wales, Australia, called Byron Bay. It has a population of 9,000.

My older sister and I were raised by a single mother. I watched my mother hold down three jobs and work tirelessly to give us a great life.

She would wake up before the sun and go to work before we left for school, and she would often get home after we did. She would then head straight to the kitchen to cook us a healthy dinner. As exhausted as she was, she did all this with a smile and the affection and warmth only a loving mother can provide.

There were times that were rough and we had no money. Yet she always found a way to pull through.

When I was eight years old, I started waking up early so I could help her set up the café where she worked before I went to school. I would sweep the ground, take out the tables and chairs, and set them up. When I was finished, she would give me a hot chocolate and some breakfast as my ‘reward’. Afterwards, kissing me on the cheek, she’d tell me she loved me and send me off to school.

Watching my mother work so hard to provide a great upbringing for my sister and me taught me the most valuable lesson I’ve ever learned.

And that is this: Nothing in life comes without hard work. Nothing is given to you. You don’t get what you ‘deserve’. You get what you push, shove, scratch, and work your arse off for. My mother taught me firsthand that having a strong work ethic is the number one determining factor for success.

It must not have been easy to ignore all the naysayers. Did you have any experiences growing up that have contributed to building your resiliency? Can you share the story with us?

When I started my business from my bedroom, I was working from home and it was just me and a few contractors. In the early days, I had a toll-free phone number and I put on a whole bunch of different accents and pretended like there was a lot of people working at my company.

I pitched a big website project for $30,000, which was life changing money to me at the time. I sent them out a proposal, they were all good to go and it got down to the final day and he was like: “Yeah, excellent stuff. We’re all ready to go ahead. This all sounds fantastic, everything looks really impressive. I’d love to just come down to your office now. Just to shake your hand and look you in the eye before we get this deal done.”

I was at home, I had no office, and I had to come up with some nonsense answer because I couldn’t exactly say: “Hey I’m just working from my bedroom right now.” He would have turned around and said: “Well, who are all those other people that I spoke to?”

I actually lost the deal as a result of that. It was a slap in the face and a wakeup call, and I started asking myself: “What are you doing here? Are you just going to keep working out of your bedroom, or are you going to build something that’s a lot bigger than yourself?” And that was the pivotal moment that made me ask that question, pony up and get an office and really start to build a proper business.

Based on your experience, can you share 5 strategies that people can use to harness the sense of tenacity and do what naysayers think is impossible? (Please share a story or an example for each)

  1. Not listening to the naysayers because they are people who aren’t successful and have already given up on their dreams. They’re simply sitting on the sideline shouting at the players on the field. There’ll never be someone that’s more successful than you that’s a naysayer to you and that’s the only reason they are naysaying.
  2. Looking at people that have achieved things against all odds and look at what they are achieving against the naysayers.
  3. Another strategy is to not give your haters any attention but also know you need to get haters and naysayers to be successful. If you don’t have any yet then you’re not well known enough and are not getting enough attention.
  4. Shut out all the noise and focus on what you’re doing and how your customers, audience, marketplace or tribe are reacting. Focus on those people because you only need 1000 fans to succeed.
  5. Work ethic is your edge. My work ethic is really the only thing that I can control. Combining clever strategy with being the hardest workers in the industry is what has seen my agency thrive. I believe there isn’t any problem that can’t be overcome by sound strategy and a sheer amount of work directed towards it.

What is your favorite quote or personal philosophy that relates to the concept of resilience?

“Successful people do all the things that unsuccessful people aren’t willing to do.” Everyone always wants a shortcut or a little hack or the quick and immediate solution to their pressing problem, but no one ever really wants to do the hard things.

When I made the decision to roll up my sleeves and make 150 cold calls a day to grow my business, I started to see a lot of success. Whenever I look at any activity, I never look for the easiest option, because that’s generally the wrong option. Every influential person has done something that nobody else wants to do.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good for the greatest number of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger.

Solving the number one problem that businesses face, ‘how do I get new customers?’, is quite a deep and meaningful endeavor for me. There isn’t really any other vehicle in the world like business to be a catalyst for change.

If you want to make a change in the world, you are going to need resources. When you change somebody’s business, it has a ripple effect. You could give back to a charity or a church or a cause, and you have the resources to actually make a change. I believe business is the best vehicle to do that. Wealthy people get a bad rap, but the wealthiest people in the world are the biggest philanthropists.

Can our readers follow you on social media?

https://www.instagram.com/kingkong.com.au/

https://www.facebook.com/kingkongco

https://twitter.com/FreeKingKong

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwDi1NwScPpDYyvwPvHBj9g/featured

https://www.instagram.com/sabrisuby/?hl=en

https://www.facebook.com/sabrisubyofficialpage/

https://twitter.com/sabrisuby?lang=en

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ssuby/?originalSubdomain=au

Thank you so much for joining us!

Dreamers: “They said it was impossible, I did it anyway”, with Sabri Suby of King Kong was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

The Future Of Beauty: “We’re seeing a trend in non-invasive treatments” With Elena Duque

I’m seeing a trend in more non-invasive treatments and that really pleases me. Less surgery equals less risk. Women and men are now able to achieve face and body goals without having to undergo major surgery and that’s a step in the right direction.

As a part of our series about how technology will be changing the beauty industry over the next five years I had the pleasure of interviewing Elena Duque. Elena Duque is an accomplished Esthetician, On-Air Beauty & Lifestyle Expert, and savvy med-spa owner in New York City. Elena has been featured in publications such as Oprah Magazine, Insider, and New York Magazine for her expertise on spas, skincare, beauty, and business. Elena has worked hands on with various esthetic devices and has demonstrated many skincare tools and gadgets on national morning shows as well. Elena has a true passion for educating consumers on new and innovative beauty & skincare products, treatments, and procedures. Elena’s mission is to help all women feel confident in the skin they’re in.

Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we dive in, our readers would love to learn a bit more about you. Can you tell us a story about what brought you to this specific career path?

I grew up in a single mother household, and funny enough, my mom was not into skincare or beauty at all. I naturally had a real affection towards anything related to skincare and beautification. Looking back I think it was my way of coping with my parent’s divorce, and the loneliness I felt. I would read the latest magazines to find out what the makeup trends were, create my own body scrubs, and use my allowance to purchase skincare and makeup. I used my little sister as my guinea pig and would apply highlights in her hair (which looked terrible!) and she would also allow me to do makeovers on her, needless to say, we had a lot of fun! At that time, I didn’t even know what an Esthetician was, but I was already creating my path without even knowing it.

Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you began your career?

In 2017 a colleague of mine casually mentioned that her friend was a producer at Good Day New York, and was looking for someone to do a segment on skincare. At that time I was two years into owning my spa, but still felt something was missing professionally. You see, I always wanted more. I grew up watching morning shows and dreamt about becoming a “beauty expert” on television, as well as a beauty writer. So, when my colleague offered me that opportunity, I pounced on it, and my life was forever changed. I got booked for an in-studio segment on Good Day New York and I was to feature and demo esthetic devices from my spa for a segment on Spring skincare. I performed an oxygen facial as well as skin tightening with radio frequency on a live model. Stepping into that studio, and getting mic’d up was exhilarating and nerve wracking all at the same time. After I got a taste of what it was like to be on television, I wanted more. I didn’t really know how to go about getting booked on more segments but I just put myself out there, and through trial and error I began to pave my own way, and now have officially become an On-Air Esthetician, Skin, & Beauty Expert.

Are you able to identify a “tipping point” in your career when you started to see success? Did you start doing anything different? Are there takeaways or lessons that others can learn from that?

There was a definite tipping point in my career in the very beginning of 2019. At that time my daughter was diagnosed with ADHD. I was doing all kinds of research, googling ways to cope with it, finding strategies to help her cope with it, learning about symptoms and characteristics of ADHD, and everything else under the sun. I put in so much time and research because I wanted to know everything about it, and how to handle it. One night, while I was sleeping, I shot up out of bed, almost unable to breathe. I had a real-life epiphany. “I have ADHD” I said aloud to no one. All the pieces to my erratic life’s puzzle came together for me. All the mistakes I made, struggles I faced, and feelings of inadequacy seemed to make a little bit of sense. I always felt different, like I didn’t belong, out of place, not good enough, and disorganized mentally and physically. It was as if I’d been sitting in the dark for 38 years and somebody finally turned on the light for me. That week I immediately went to a psychiatrist, underwent testing, and was in fact diagnosed with ADD inattentive type, an anxiety disorder and depression. I had a lot of mixed emotions, but mainly I was sad because I felt I was cheated out of a better life, I kept wondering what my life would have been like if I had been diagnosed at an early age, and gotten help. I always struggled to stay in school, hold down a job, finish a project, and stay the course, and like most people with ADD/ADHD, I would blame myself. After receiving my diagnosis I began therapy sessions and taking medication. In the last 18 months I’ve been able to accomplish more than I’ve ever thought possible. My confidence and my career have sky rocketed. I’ve been able to complete tasks with more ease, and I’ve learned how to be more organized and efficient. The biggest lesson I learned from this experience is that mental health is so important and so often goes undiagnosed or just gets ignored. I also learned that it’s never too late to follow your dreams, and if you want something, you have to go out and get it.

None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person to whom you are grateful who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?

I’m a very lucky person to be surrounded by a loving and supportive family, but the one person who has been my rock, and my biggest cheerleader, is my husband Matt. We’ve been married almost 9 years, but we’ve been together for 12 years. In the 12 years we’ve been together, I’ve come up with more plans, Shark Tank Ideas, and business proposals than I can even recall. Never once did he discredit any of my dreams or ideas, and trust me I had some pretty bad ones. I always felt supported and encouraged by him, and I’m so lucky to have such a positive and dependable partner by my side. He is so proud of me for always going after what I want, and for finally seeing my dreams come to fruition.

Ok super. Let’s now shift to the main part of our discussion. The beauty industry today has access to technology that was inconceivable only a short time ago. Can you tell us about the “cutting edge” (pardon the pun) technologies that you are working with or introducing? How do you think that will help people?

Right now I’m working a lot with microneedling and radio frequency and I love combining the two treatments. Microneedling uses a bunch of tiny needles to build collagen, reduce scars and dark spots, and improve skins texture. The treatment is paired with a topical medical grade serum. Radio Frequency is a skin tightening procedure that uses RF to heat skin, and stimulate collagen production. By combining them I’ve noticed quicker, better results. These treatments are non-invasive, regenerate collagen, and enables the skin to naturally lift and tighten. Best of all there is little to no pain, and no downtime. Patients leave with a natural looking brow lift, visibly reduced lines around the nasolabial folds, and a more refined jawline. Women will feel more confident, rejuvenated and refreshed, without having to break the bank or go under the knife.

Keeping “Black Mirror” and the “Law of Unintended Consequences” in mind, can you see any potential drawbacks about this technology that people should think more deeply about?

I love your reference to Black Mirror, it’s a favorite of mine! There are a few potential drawbacks to microneedling, one in particular is a newer form of semi-permanent makeup on the market called BB Glow. BB Glow uses microneedling to infuse makeup into the skin, specifically foundation. You can literally say “I woke up like this” and mean it. I say, proceed with caution. This procedure is not yet approved by the FDA, and not enough studies have been done on what the long-term effects are. You’re also running the risk of infection, an allergic reaction to the makeup, organ toxicity, and contact dermatitis.

Can you share 3 things that most excite you about the “beauty-tech” industry?

I’m seeing a trend in more non-invasive treatments and that really pleases me. Less surgery equals less risk. Women and men are now able to achieve face and body goals without having to undergo major surgery and that’s a step in the right direction.

Personalized and customized beauty is becoming more and more popular. Many makeup retailers have software that virtually allow you to try on hundreds of lipstick and eyeshadow shades whether in-store or through an app. I’ve personally tried this technology and it’s incredible how accurate it is.

Skin analysis through artificial intelligence is growing with the big beauty brands. Virtual skincare may sound futuristic, but it’s been around for a few years. This technology hasn’t gotten the best feedback, but companies have been making strides to tweak and improve their flaws. I predict that once it’s perfected, people will be prefer to use this technology, and the need for an in-person consultation with a skincare professional will be obsolete.

Can you share 3 things that most concern you about the industry? If you had the ability to implement 3 ways to reform or improve the industry, what would you suggest?

At-home Esthetic devices such as laser hair removal and microneedling concern me. As an Esthetician I know how potentially dangerous these devices can be when not used properly. People who are not educated in skincare and use these tools at home can self-inflict burns, micro tears, or worse if they don’t follow the proper protocols, not to mention these devices are not as effective as a machine that is used in a med spa or dermatology office.

I feel that the beauty and beauty tech industry is becoming over saturated and inundated with gimmicky treatments, products, and services. It seems as though these new trends are being created to top the competitors, and not created with the actual consumer in mind. Sometimes, simple is best and people just want results, without all the bells and whistles.

There’s a huge gray area when it comes to Esthetician’s and what they (we) can do within their scope of practice, and it varies by state. The amount of hours required to obtain an Esthetics license also varies by state. My concern is that the education and guidelines are not consistent and it needs to be more uniform. Esthetician’s want to keep up with new and trending treatments and the latest devices to hit the market, but at the rate the beauty tech industry is growing, technology is evolving faster than individual state legislation can keep up with. This is leading to even more concern and more unanswered questions when it comes to what procedures Estheticians are allowed to perform legally.

You are an expert about beauty. Can you share 5 ideas that anyone can use “to feel beautiful”? (Please share a story or example for each.)

Beauty and feeling beautiful really does start from within. I have a mantra that I say aloud every morning with my daughters while I’m getting them ready for school. “ I am beautiful, I am kind, I am loved”.

A mini self-facial massage will make you look and feel beautiful, refreshed, and relaxed. Add this to your morning routine and you will feel and see a glow.

Create beauty around you. Buy flowers, a new plant, or declutter your space. You will instantly feel beauty when you see your surroundings in a positive light.

Put on your favorite outfit. Sometimes our clothes can really change our attitude and boost confidence.

Fill your mind with beautiful thoughts and you will exude beauty. Think about positive experiences you’ve had, places you’ve been, and the people you love. When you focus on the happy elements in your life, you will feel beautiful and full of gratitude.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 😊

As I’ve mentioned before, beauty starts from within. I want to inspire women to first work on themselves on a mental level before a physical level. We have to stop and ask ourselves, “why do I want to change/altar/tweak my appearance”? Make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons. If you’re feeling sad, depressed, imbalanced, or unstable, seek professional help. I think that social media can give a lot of women a false reality of what beauty is, and it is causing a lot of women to get plastic surgery to look “Instagram perfect” and it’s very alarming. You are perfectly imperfect, embrace it.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?

My life lesson quote actually comes from my mom’s famous words “Do the right thing”. Of course as a teenager it annoyed me but that one simple phrase has stuck with me throughout my life. As an Esthetician and entrepreneur I always act with honesty and respect towards my clients and I take pride in the fact that I only work with brands that I believe in, and when I work with spa clients I will only recommend products or services that they need. I try to be ethical and practical and do the right thing, because in the end, I have to live with my choices and I want to give myself the respect that I deserve.

How can our readers follow you online?

My website: https://www.elenaduquebeauty.com/

Thank you so much for joining us. This was very inspirational.

The Future Of Beauty: “We’re seeing a trend in non-invasive treatments” With Elena Duque was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Dreamers: “They told me It was impossible and I did it anyway” With Anita Tilly

One of the best thing you can do is to get help from somebody who will guide you to grow and achieve your dream faster. I know you are strong and want to do it on your own, but you don’t have to. Its OK to ask for some help from somebody who had already gone through the same road as you are about to.

As a part of our series about “dreamers who ignored the naysayers and did what others said was impossible”, I had the pleasure of interviewing Anita Tilly. She is a personal brand development coach and a business mentor. She works with passionate female entrepreneurs to build a profitable personal brand by finding their voice, uniqueness and leverage the power of storytelling so that they can stand out and be the go to person in their industry. She is the host of The Dreamers to Dreamers Podcast where she is sharing her and other amazing women’s journey with you through weekly episodes and interviews. This is your show to listen if you want all the success, happiness, confidence and passion in your life. Anita’s mission is to help women to see that is possible for them to live in their desired reality and give them tools to realize their vision. The Podcast is very inspirational and filled with knowledge, mindset, strategies, and tips to create your dream life.

Thank you so much for joining us! Our readers would love to ‘get to know you’ a bit better. Can you tell us your ‘backstory’?

As I was growing up in Hungary, I always looked beyond what is possible. Finally, at the time I was 21 years old I left my home and my country to pursue my dreams. It was the best decision of my life. This was the moment when my life has started.

I traveled to several European countries, to America, to India, and I settled down in the Netherlands for a few years. I met my great mentor who guided me to create and run a SPA center. I loved it, it made me happy and I learned a lot. This project was a 6 figures business, so I am very proud of it. Then I realized that this is not my dream I am building. I was very grateful for the opportunity, but I had to move on and start my own entrepreneur journey.

I moved to France with my amazing, best-ever husband and we both become entrepreneurs. I knew that building my own business is in my blood. I was ten when I started my first business project. I created a well-organized plan on how to open and run a vegetable stand that I presented to the mayor of the town. YEP, at ten…… So, I could not ignore who I am. My brain and logic are set to own a business and help others to do the same.

Therefore, now I am helping passionate female coaches and mentors to create a profitable personal brand, finding their voice and using their uniqueness so that they can attract their ideal clients and stand out in their niche by being unapologetically themselves.

Are you working on any new or exciting projects now? How do you think that will help people?

Yes, absolutely! I have just created and launched a new podcast The Dreamers to Dreamers, where I am interviewing amazing women who followed their dreams and started their own business, made their hobbies, their main income stream because they refused to settle for anything less than it all. My mission with this is to reach as many women as possible all around the world and inspire them to believe in themselves and go after their dreams and start to live in their desired reality.

The Dreamers to Dreamers Podcast is very inspirational so it will motivate so many people through real life stories and experiences to stand up and give a leap of faith to themselves. And as an extra, all the episodes are full with knowledge so if they listen in and ready to make the change in their life they are getting actions steps through mindset, strategies, and tips to create their dream life. One step at the time.

In your opinion, what do you think makes your company or organization stand out from the crowd?

I love this question, because this is my gem! I know that my business started to scale when I started to embrace who I am and act from that place. Therefore today, I create content that is empowering because I can be unapologetically myself. And this is the exact thing that I have been teaching to entrepreneurs.

I have seen so many talented people in the online business world and they are looking for another strategy, a better marketing tip, when all they really need is to embrace who they are. They must stop hiding, trying to be somebody else, trying to impress people and be on the safe side by living up to expectations.

Now is the time more than ever that uniqueness is the key to stand out. Finding and enlivening that uniqueness is starting by taking back what is rightfully ours, — OURSELVES — .

When entrepreneurs do that, they will start to use their voice more often, they will gain confidence, which leads to empowering beliefs and actions in their business.

So if you are an entrepreneur and want more visibility and engagement you must embrace the person you want to become and lead with your voice, you should share your story so that you can connect emotionally with your ideal audience and clients.

Ok, thank you for that. I’d like to jump to the main focus of this interview. Has there ever been a time that someone told you something was impossible, but you did it anyway? Can you share the story with us? What was your idea? What was the reaction of the naysayers? And how did you overcome that?

Oh yes, as I mentioned I grew up in Hungary. My family did not have much money and therefore having big dreams was not normal. Finish school, go to work, get married, have children. That’s it. And this is a wonderful life for some. But for me, it felt like if I am captured in a life that is meant for somebody else.

I always had three dreams growing up; 1 Travel and see the world!; 2 Be free by working from where ever I want!; 3 Do what I love!

My dreams had been, and they still are very important to me and I hold them very close to my heart. But when I talked about them to my family or close friends, they told me that I am greedy to wanting more and that I am ungrateful for what I already have or I got the big sad eyes “ Oh poor Anita is dreaming again”. It felt terrible.

I knew if I want more I must look beyond my current situation, and I must take my life into my hands. So, I had two choice, follow my path or stay where I am and be the person, they want me to be. And I said to myself that it is not an option. I meant for more.

I remember a conversation with my mom just a few days before leaving our home and the country. She said to me, why you could not just stay here and get a “normal” life. I said to her “Mom, I love you and I say this with love and respect but why would you ask me to stay and live the same life as you do?! Working days and nights for so little money that is not even enough to go for holiday in summer. You barely see your husband. You can’t wish this type of life for me.” She looked at me and finally understood what I was talking about. She hugged me and said, “fly my little bird and build your own life”.

In the end, how were all the naysayers proven wrong? 🙂

To be honest I don’t think they felt themselves wrong, or they would never admit it. But for me it had never been the goal. I am just a girl with a dream and all I wanted to make that dream to my reality. So now as I am writing this from a coffee place by the sea in France and helping women with extraordinary dreams and passions to build their desired reality and feel comfortable and confident to being themselves. This is my reward. This was my goal all along.

None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?

Absolutely. There are two people who I want to express my thanks to.

First is my amazing husband who was always there for me. He helped me overcome so many negative self-beliefs by having confidence in me and telling me that I can do it. “Everything is going to be ok, just give it a try and I am here to catch you if you fall”. His love and encouragement were a big help along the way.

And the other person is my mom. She is my light. Even in my childhood there were a lot of sadness, she always gave me love and told me that how special I am for may times. I always felt that the love she gave me, made me who I am and now I have enough love inner me for the whole world. This is the love that will take me and many others to unimaginable heights.

It must not have been easy to ignore all the naysayers. Did you have any experiences growing up that have contributed to building your resiliency? Can you share the story with us?

Going through my memories as a child and young adult I can say that all the negative beliefs that were planted in my mind growing up were very difficult to deal with. I had many challenges that I had to overcome. One of them was to see myself succeed and that all the things I heard, “You are not enough”, “It is not going to work”, “You are not a native English speaker”, “You are losing your time trying and you will end up with nothing!”. These are strong statements and I struggled to let them go and arrive to a point where I don’t see them anymore as my values but as a reflection of those people who have said it. I had to do a lot of self-development, so I have learned Transcendental Meditation and I am practicing it for 10 years till now. This technique helped me to have better understanding who I am and have a deeper connection with myself. I also journal a lot and read positive books.

Today I live my life by the rules that I create, by the vision I have and by the beliefs that I planted in my mind. Because I am not my past, I am not who they thought me to be.

Based on your experience, can you share 5 strategies that people can use to harness the sense of tenacity and do what naysayers think is impossible? (Please share a story or an example for each)

1. Clarity

You must get crystal clear about your vision. It is not enough to have a dream, but you need to take steps to accomplish your goals. So, make some quite moment, take a piece of paper and write out your dream. What do you really want to achieve? Who do you want to become? How do you want your next year to be? Answer those questions because it will shine light onto all the missing pieces, and it will show you what you must do next.

2. Boundaries

You must make sure that you create your own boundaries because you will get influenced by so many people. By choosing your tribe will help you to stay positive and keep believing in your dream.

You must look up to those who caring about your dream and they will support you to step forward.

I know having a vision is an exciting thing, but you have to make sure that you are telling the right people so that you don’t get discouraged!

3. Embrace the person you want to become

During clarity work and setting your boundaries you will start to recognize your voice more and more and this is a very important step because this will help you to gain more confidence and to see your worth. You have to start to believe in yourself because sometimes you will be the only one who believes in yourself and you need that strength to keep going. Which one is my next point.

4. Keep going

Going down on the road of self-discovery and taking steps to realize your dream can be challenging and you never know how far you are from the finish line. So, you just keep believing, learning, growing, evolving, climbing those walls and one day you will realize that you are living your dream. Just never give up. Be flexible and change your actions if is necessary but never stop.

5. Get support

One of the best thing you can do is to get help from somebody who will guide you to grow and achieve your dream faster. I know you are strong and want to do it on your own, but you don’t have to. Its OK to ask for some help from somebody who had already gone through the same road as you are about to. Getting support and having your tribe around you, people who share the same values as you, they will give you more strength and confidence, so never be shy or afraid to ask for some help.

What is your favorite quote or personal philosophy that relates to the concept of resilience?

My very favorite quote is from Erin Hanson

“There is freedom waiting for you,

On the breezes of the sky,

And you ask “What if I fall?”

Oh but my darling,

What if you fly?”

This means everything to me and I look at the part that is tattooed onto my wrist “what if you fly” very often to get some courage.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good for the greatest number of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger.

Yes, I would love to extend my podcast to wider range to reach more women around the globe. I want them to feel safe, I want them to know that is OK to dream, it is ok to dream big and bold, and that is more than OK to go after their dreams. One step at the time. They must decide to stop hiding and staying in their comfort zone instead see that they are ready. Ready to fly, become a doer and achieve extraordinary things.

Can our readers follow you on social media?

https://anitatilly.com/

https://www.instagram.com/anitatillybranding/

https://www.facebook.com/AnitaTillyBranding/

Podcast: Dreamers to Dreamers

Thank you for these great stories. We wish you only continued success!

Dreamers: “They told me It was impossible and I did it anyway” With Anita Tilly was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.