Female Disruptors: Feminine Leadership Coach Ela Staniak On The Three Things You Need To Shake Up Your Industry
An Interview With Candice Georgiadis
A high percentage of women today experience continuous resistance, feeling frustrated or stuck without clarity on how to achieve the next milestone whether it is in their career/business, finances, intimate relationship or wellbeing. Being overlooked, unsupported, unappreciated, struggling to find your voice, getting promoted over, allowing disrespect from the male fraternity. Until you address what’s impacted you in the past you will never achieve the heights of what it is you are standing for!
As a part of our series about women who are shaking things up in their industry, I had the pleasure of interviewing Ela Staniak — Founder of Feminine Leaders.
As a Feminine Leadership Coach to female C-Suite & Business Leaders, Ela champions unprecedented results for women ready to break through the perception of the ‘glass ceiling’ and gain their rightful place at the boardroom table or claim their space in their entrepreneurial zone of genius.
Ela spent the last nearly 15 years working with high calibre female leaders internationally in a broad range of industries from government, technology, finance, mining, media, to athletes, millionaires, entrepreneurs specialising in vertical (consciousness) & horizontal (skills and capabilities) behavioural change in female leadership development.
‘Feminine Leaders’ was born out of a passion to empower women to champion their ‘inner game’, reclaim their moxie and feminine leadership qualities to lead and live THE ULTIMATE LIFE personally and professionally.
Ela landed coverage in hundreds of print and broadcast outlets around the world including her 2020 TED Talk “Diversity & Inclusion are logically impossible”.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we dig in, our readers would like to get to know you a bit more. Can you tell us a bit about your “backstory”? What led you to this particular career path?
I was born and grew up in the south of Poland. Growing up with an alcoholic father and a mother who suffered obesity and heart problems was challenging. Losing both of my parents before I turned 15 years of age impacted my life tremendously. Looking at the silver lining in my upbringing this experience propelled me to relocate first to Ireland and then to Australia to do a college degree. Studies in motivational psychology and athletic performance awakened an incredible passion within me to explore the power of human potential. For over a decade I immersed myself in revolving around behavioural change and studied Fitness & Sports Coaching, Wellness Coaching, Neurolinguistics, Hypnotherapy, Leadership & Business Coaching and Intuitive Coaching.
I established a career initially in fitness and wellness specialising in behavioural change and later in feminine leadership coaching. Over the years, I understood that without the right tools to navigate adversity human beings often disconnect/ dissociate/ escape emotionally. I had to disconnect to survive at a young age. Disconnect = lack of self-value. Lack of self-worth continued to impact my health, my relationships and my finances until I embarked on a journey to self-actualisation and with that my LIFE went through a metamorphosis.
I reshaped my body and lost 15kg of body weight. I faced poor leadership and navigated direct and indirect discrimination in the workplaces in three different countries due to my own differences and some of them being speaking English as a second language, being a woman working in male dominated environments, and apparently being way too positive and optimistic for some. I have been called a “fruit cake” before and now I take it as a compliment! I steered through abusive relationships to find what self-love really means. Here’s what my biggest lesson was in life. “Unless you acknowledge what’s impacted you in the past and “do the work” on unconscious beliefs, you will continue repeating destructive patterns”. It wasn’t until I faced my biggest fears, and became a self-aware and well integrated human being that I understood what it truly means to be a leader.
Can you tell our readers what it is about the work you’re doing that’s disruptive?
There is a negative listening to the word “feminine”, a misconception that feminine is weak, unsubstantial, submissive. That there is no place for feminine in the c-suite and business for masculine tendencies have been predominant in leadership successfully for decades.
In some cases, women have been modelling masculine traits for so long, that now they reject their feminine qualities which they perceive as foreign. DISCONNECTION ALERT LADIES!
The essence of true femininity is powerful and magnetic. Feminine Leadership I believe is an art of ‘owning your presence’. Those leaders who become wholly and completely integrated in all facets of their identity and can strategically draw from masculine and feminine qualities, are the leaders who become incredibly impactful, influential and truly lead by example. These leaders walk the talk and demonstrate the significant difference between DOING leadership vs BEING leadership.
I believe that the world needs more empowered, thriving and confident women at all levels of decision making to assist with finding sustainable solutions to some of the most horrendous and preventable issues we face in our global society.
Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?
The biggest mistake I made in business was putting all of my eggs in one basket! I spent years building my sales funnels, communities and my following mostly on Facebook. In the middle of 2020 due to online hacking I lost access to all my accounts, groups and business page. Just like that, it was all gone. Deleted! I felt that I had failed my community given the years of hard work and trust that I had built were violated overnight.
I am a big believer that “Everything happens for me, for it is my own creation” so I took it a sign to go to the next level of trajectory. I reinvented myself, my business and I rebranded. It was the best and most life-changing decision I could ever make, however it took something to rebuild my business and my identity as a business owner differently. Two of the most important the lessons I learned are: A) Protect your business and your communities with urgency and care B) You must have multiple lead generation strategies to create sustainable income flow in your business. Work smart, not hard.
We all need a little help along the journey. Who have been some of your mentors? Can you share a story about how they made an impact?
Absolutely! One of my biggest learnings is this: “Support is your greatest strength and never a weakness”. One of the most profound mentors I have had to date is Sally Anderson — Leadership Coach To The Influencers. Sally has privately coached key influencers nationally and internationally over a 2 decade period: CEO’s, politicians, global influencers, visionaries, celebrities, millionaires, billionaires,. Those looking for ‘sustainable’ leading edge performance.
Sally’s Linkedin Profile is: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sallyanderson-leadershipcoachtotheinfluencers/
Sally partnered me in changing my life, took my leadership skills to a completely new dimension and transformed my business from 0–100 in a matter weeks!
If you have a serious calling in life and want to fast forward your results by decades I suggest you invest in one of the BEST leadership coaches on the planet.
I have invested under $200,000 in business mentoring and education in my life, Sally tops any coach I have ever hired, WITHOUT A DOUBT.
This journey is not for faint-hearted, but if you are serious about leading and living your legacy in this lifetime it is beyond worth it!
In today’s parlance, being disruptive is usually a positive adjective. But is disrupting always good? When do we say the converse, that a system or structure has ‘withstood the test of time’? Can you articulate to our readers when disrupting an industry is positive, and when disrupting an industry is ‘not so positive’? Can you share some examples of what you mean?
When I launched ‘Feminine Leaders’ I knew I was challenging the status quo. It was obvious after nearly 15 years of working with women at all levels of leadership in multiple industries that making a sustainable change where Feminine Leadership and its positioning in C-Suite and Business is concerned was going to be a journey which would require resilience while navigating resistance and persistence to stand by my message.
I knew I was challenging decades of leadership structures where masculine tendencies have been predominant. Truth to be told the unconscious bias in our society relating stereotypical roles of men and women in the workplaces and beyond are still present.
Many men and women run confusion on how to work together, support each other and co-create extraordinary outcomes in the modern world where modeling our old workplace and home generational patterns does no longer apply. Vast majority of women are left feeling unsupported, undervalued and unacknowledged.
All that being said I know the world is beyond ready for change. More diversity through female voices I believe will result in more productive equitable outcomes worldwide.
I believe what is happening today in the health & wellness industry is not so positive. The global wellness industry, including spiritual self-care, has grown to $4 trillion. Despite the global market being overflooded with solutions to personal & professional development, weight loss, happiness and health, the effectiveness of these products and services is questionable.
Sustainable results where complete physical and emotional transformation is concerned is elusive. Focusing on treating the symptom of dysfunction keeps people stuck in the same destructive behavioural patterns.
Doing the ‘inner work’ and becoming a powerfully connected human being where all facets of one’s identity: physical, emotional and spiritual are integrated is the key to experiencing real transformation.
Can you share 3 of the best words of advice you’ve gotten along your journey? Please give a story or example for each.
- Stop giving lip service to your spoken word. Results will always remain elusive if you do not transform your relationship with your spoken word.
- Stop being so nice, so appropriate, so accommodating to others needs to the deficit of your own — put yourself first and foremost.
- Understand what it means to be ‘committed’ — stop selling out to excuses.
We are sure you aren’t done. How are you going to shake things up next?
Oh, I am only getting started! My vision can be articulated in 5 key objectives:
1. Advocate for ending domestic and family violence period
2. Advocate for building legislation in relation to supporting immigrants who experience domestic and family violence in Australia
3. Advocate for mental wellness in all sectors of society
4. Advocate for female representation at the highest levels worldwide
5. Advocate for providing sustainable solutions to the obesity issues we face globally
In your opinion, what are the biggest challenges faced by ‘women disruptors’ that aren’t typically faced by their male counterparts?
CHALLENGE 1. A high percentage of women today experience continuous resistance, feeling frustrated or stuck without clarity on how to achieve the next milestone whether it is in their career/business, finances, intimate relationship or wellbeing. Being overlooked, unsupported, unappreciated, struggling to find your voice, getting promoted over, allowing disrespect from the male fraternity. Until you address what’s impacted you in the past you will never achieve the heights of what it is you are standing for!
CHALLENGE 2. Women who feel disconnected, “at full capacity” or “out of alignment”
There is a distinct difference between DOING leadership vs. BEING leadership. You are human BEING and not human DOING. When you are connected, you are full of life energy, in a heightened state of awareness, incredibly receptive to receiving insight and assessing your environment. Once you are in alignment you become powerful beyond limitations. When you are guided by your intuition and connected to your feminine essence anxiety, overwhelm and busyness disappear.
CHALLENGE 3. Many women tend to be professional saboteurs when it comes to putting their needs first. They support EVERYONE else but sadly do not support themselves to the same degree. Until you put the oxygen mask on yourself first and address the self-debilitating beliefs that are sabotaging your potential nothing will change. You teach people on how to treat you, so if the standard of how you are treated is not of the standard you deserve you and only you can change this dynamic.
Do you have a book/podcast/talk that’s had a deep impact on your thinking? Can you share a story with us?
“Three Initiates: The Kybalion” is a study of the hermetic philosophy of Ancient Egypt and Greece. The book presents the Seven Principles of Nature. These principles represent the power of Truth and Knowledge, and thus they will endure forever, no matter are they studied and questioned with the terms of different religions or fields of science. I highly recommend for those people who are wanting to discover the roots of universal knowledge known to humankind.
You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂
I want my son to grow up in a world where women stand in their power of feminine leadership, where instead of fighting for diversity & inclusion we champion equality and embrace each other as valuable people with unique strengths and talents. I see a world where women find their voice at all levels of leadership, earning their worth and their rightful place at a boardroom table/ or entrepreneurial zone of genius or any personal aspiration. I see a world free of domestic and family violence, where safety and love is available to all people. I dream of our society being free of obesity and instead being healthy, thriving where a pathway to emotional, physical and spiritual wellbeing is understood and available.
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
André Gide — ‘You can never cross the ocean until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore’
Navigating adversity only to discover new horizons has been my life’s journey from a young age. Every time I decided to achieve more, to become a better version of myself I had to let go to the old disruptive paradigms. If you truly want to evolve as a leader, I suggest you (1) Fall in love with resistance (2) Embrace uncertainty as your ally and (3) Be willing to lean in when you want to back out…
How can our readers follow you online?
LINKED IN
https://www.linkedin.com/in/ela-staniak-feminine-leadership-coach/
WEBSITE
https://www.instagram.com/ela_staniak/
This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for joining us!
Female Disruptors: Feminine Leadership Coach Ela Staniak On The Three Things You Need To Shake Up… was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.